It's more like 3:45 a.m. and I am wide awake, again. I've tossed and turned for what seems the entire night and I know Jim will say that I made plenty of sleep noises. lol Maybe so, but I still do not feel that I get the right kind of sleep.
When I first sat down here I noticed that I had not turned over the page on my daily calender -- for two days. It was still on Dec. 18. It was then that it hit me..four years ago, on Dec. 18, our little mom, Carmen, lost her battle with breast cancer. I tell you, I thank the Lord for small favors, again! I was so sick on Thursday, Dec. 18, that not ONCE did that thought cross my mind! At first I was shocked that I did not even think of that day as Mom's death day this year. I was also a little cross with myself that I had been so selfish that I did not even remember! But, just as quickly, I realized that again, our Lord fixed it so I would not be sad on that day...just sick! LOL He has a twisted sense of humor sometimes, but I love it! Normally, Judy and I would have discussed it. She happened to be traveling that day on her way home from Dallas. If she remembered, she never said. Since I didn't visit with Dad that day thinking he was better off without my germs, I don't know if he remembered, either.
Naturally, not a day passes that I don't think of Mom. I'm sure I thought of her on Dec. 18, just not in the context of what that day signifies. Thanks, Mom. I still miss you and love you, probably more as the years pass. Your legacy lives on.
4 comments:
Isn't the Lord good???? I lost both of my parents during December (not in the same year) and I always get sad during Decemeber, but I am noticing it is getting easier.
Hang on to those great memories of your Mom....they will sustain you.
All the wonderful memories of your mother will stay with you and the pain does go away. It does take what seems to be, a long time. Hope you're feeling better and you have a wonderful Christmas.
hugz:)
Candi
You have been bust since I last visited your blog. Great stuff. You have a good eye for color. My mom died when I was 28, and I still think of her most every day and I'm now nearly 58. I never did remember the day she died, but I always remember her on her birthday, happier times I guess. Have a great Christmas.
Oh Veronica,
I wish I wasn't 50 miles away....hugs do help!!! I lost my mom to Alzheimers 2 1/2 years ago. She was my quilting mentor and we had the best times together in fabric shops. We really do have to have lunch one day after the holidays.
Hugs, Barb
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